Alright, well this is the second time I'm typing this little blurb since I clicked a link and erased everything. Good thing I only got through a couple lines.

I was just writing in here to keep up the momentum, since the blog seems to be alive and kicking these days.

Brendan: We're idiots! Haha. Tonight was hella fun though w/ the Gypsy and Ted. Thanks for keeping my head where it supposed to be.

Brian: It's good to see your alive.

Well, I'm done w/ finals, my last one took 8 minutes and everyone in my class was stunned. It was cake and if I didn't know an answer, I think I put down a good guess (m/c) and it was a class where I had a guaranteed A in. Kind of like the highlight of my week. I was soooo bored and I was pissed because my final was on a Thursday night at 7pm. Waste of time, but oh wellz.

This week was kind of a bummer because I just found out Kevin wasn't moving out w/ me next year. He decided to stay in Chico, read my Xanga if you want to learn more of the details. I'm just writing about why I was so bummed. Brendan put it perfectly...it begins....all of us going our seperate paths...well..friends at least. It's sad to see and I just hate that it's starting so early for some of us. Kevin is definitely one of my best friends, I've lived w/ him for almost 3 years and he's the best roommate I could ever ask for. I hate going in seperate paths because it means that we probably won't be as close, won't get to hang out as much and I bet we'll talk a lot less and that sucks. Soon, it could be all of us going different paths, Brendan moving to LA to pursue a new career, Steve, Brian and Derek getting jobs god knows where, but they could be anywhere and with this economy Jonathan and I could be in different places too. We just don't know. I guess we just have to cherish the time we have together before we go our seperate ways to pursue a career, family, life goals, etc. Seriously all of you are guys I want to continue to keep in touch w/, have get togethers w/ our families, still hang out. Even though I hate losing money in poker, it's a time where we all get together and just chill. I'll take it. All in all, I'm holding out some hope that we all stay together and continue talking. Friends are what make life interesting and fun. And going along w/ Steve's blog, we all know each other, we all know how we act, when we're serious, and we're joking around. Kevin is like that for me too. If he were only Asian, he could join this blog...haha j/k.

All in all, I'm bummed. It's a big letdown and I'm disappointed, not in him, but on not being able to be in the same town, live together. I guess we gotta grow up sometime and this is part of it, moving on. Sorry for the sappy blog, just became reality that we could all be parting ways and its sad to see. I know I'm not losing a friend, but it sure feels like it.

Thanks to Brendan, Tiffany and others for cheering me up. I needed it.

Linkin Park Cd, March 25....not May, I'm sure all of you know that anyway. Can't wait for the concert!

Spring Break should be fun, I'll be home on Tuesday, I'm ready!

Just in case you haven't checked, bhlee3.tripod.com was updated recently. Hopefully Brendan will come up w/ an advertisement for Tony and Brendan Morris so that they can get all the fly hunniez!

Take care...good luck to those w/ finals and midterms left. I know...there's only one day left in the week, but there are finals on Fridays hehe.

Good Night...LL Cool B, B Lee Dat, Bry, B-oTch signing off....

Over and Out

didn't finish my fucking blog but i guess it decided to publish it anyways...fuckers...

anywayz. Yeh.
Slurs, cussing, unpolitical terms, being fucked up...if there's one person who's guilty of this shit, it's yours truly. Man, do you guys remember me in high school? I think i cussed every other word. So yeh, i have a dirty mouth. And I could say that my language doesn't reflect who i am, but that doesn't really work. Cuz even you don't mean it, ur still saying it. It's like if you punch me, even if you did it accidently, that shit still hurts. But what's my point here? My point is you guys know me pretty well. Especially jon. And if there's one thing that i find comfort in, it's the fact that i can just be myself, act however the fuck i want to, and you'll accept me. Cuz you know me..the kind of person i am...and guys know that i'm not an asshole (well, sometimes). Comfort. Letting lose. Spitting rage. That's what being in the company of friends is all about. I know it's important to talk in a nice manner..being polite, and especially being proper ("hey man ur short" "HEY! that's VERTICALLY CHALLENGED!!"). But the last thing i want to do when i'm around u guys is to have to constantly think about how to act. Being reckless is my specialty.

underdog thing - i didn't read it. Too long. All i know is, I lose a lot. At everything. Pretty soon you get used to losing. So, when u don't lose (or dont lose as bad), then it's pleasant surprise. Pessemists can be pleasantly surprised. Optimists can't, but they CAN get punch in the fucking face. Realists don't give a fuck either way, cuz whatever happens happens. Actually i think i'm a realist-pessemist hybrid. i'm definitely NOT a optimist...fuck that sun...heheh

finals. I fucking hate them. hate them so much. My poli sci prof is a DICK. I found out he graduated from stanford. Now i know why he's a fucking cocky asshole. Fuck standford. Ur asses got beat down by USC in the tourney. Who's got the axe by the way? Yeh. Suck a dick.

damn..spring break can't get here any sooner.

May 25 - new linkin park album..yeeeessssssssssssssssssssssss...

But the question is, would you be given the chance to show what you have inside if you're ugly as fuck on the outside? Most people won't be as free in the beginning with an ugly person, ya think? Anyway, my opinion on the whole cosmetic thing is negative. If someone hates how they look that much, I don't think plastic surgery will help. What they need is a swift kick to the nuts or a friend to tell them they look good as they are.

Anyway, happy belated birthday Brendan! Hope the shit with your family isn't keeping you down too far... Have you watched Ringu yet? How did you like it? It wasn't as scary as I thought it would be, but it did have it's moments. Had I watched it first though, I think I would have shit myself. There's a new japanese move that just came out sort of along the lines of Ringu, but I think it's more jumpy than psycological... It's called Ju-On: The Grudge. Anyone heard of it? I saw the trailer and was pretty creeped out.

Music... I'm the same as always... I usually listen to what's good. Most of the time though I find that I'm molding to what others think... That trip we took down to So. Cal? I wasn't even close to liking Linkin Park during the first hour. But as the trip went on... I started to like them, and I happened to buy that CD. It's happened on more than one occasion too... I guess if I listened to the radio more, I'd be a pop music whore...

hehe following Bryant's structure, so I guess next up is THE UNDERDOG

I'll relate it to good old DDR... I'm usually beaten solidly to the ground when playing against my friend... I usually quit though, if I'm beaten down so soundly. It could be because I think I don't have a chance at beating such a score. But when It's close, I'll play the game to death. And once I get it, I'm the happiest bastard on the face of the planet. I usually then move on to other things. Losing badly is one thing, but coming close is "good enough." I actually think that's a fairly bad attitute to have, and I'm trying to change it slowly. I need to stay competitive no matter what level I'm at. But it's a little discouraging to be so far down :(

So we're just a few days away from the next gulf war... Personally, I'm against this one... I really don't like the idea of a pre-emptive strike on what COULD be. The whole thing turned kind of sour when those documents that we presented were forged. I like how they didn't say too much about that. Buncha bullshit I tell you. But then again, I keep hearing these "Support the Troops" over seas... Yes, there are some people who are over there against their will and even people we know... I'm not for this "We should be unified as a country" bull shit though. So what? Are we not allowed to have our own opinions? I read the other day about some country singer apologizing to the president for a comment she made about how she was embarrassed about how Bush was from Texas. Before that, people all over the country were saying, "Oh we should stop playing her music! She isn't cool anymore." So she apologizes just to get that record sale back up. It's a damn sad how someone with voice in the community can get shot down like that, and their personal opinions must be kept private to keep sales up. I figure if you're famous and have a voice, use it. It's not enough to have a lot of us little people running around making noise that Bush apparently DOES NOT HEAR. But then I figure she's a country singer and most of those people are ignorant anyway :P

So yeah. We go to war... Yay to the troops that are there, but BOOO to the nation for throwing us into this conflict.

Who wants to grow up anyway?

two more things on what was said

-doin' shit to your body. Hey, if you want to get fake cha-chas or a smaller gut, or maybe you want ur face changed, that's your perrogative. i would like to think that no matter what you do, people are more appreciative of natural beauty.It's about how you are on the inside, not the outside. Now, how you look on the outside may change how you feel on the inside, but yeh.. Do you remember a children's book by Roald Dahl..called "the twits"? one thing i remember most about that book is it basically said, you can look beautiful no matter how you look on the outside, as long as you look beautiful on the inside. Corny, and cheesy, but i think it's true. You can be ugly as fuck, but as long as you're awesome on the inside, as roald dahl put it "the sunshine from inside will always come out and you will always look awesome". or something like that.

slurs - if there is one person in this group who needs their mouth washed out with soap, it's me.

Well, I am glad to see that there is some heated discussion on this thing, but I just want to throw in my 2 cents on everything:

Brendan's Family - Jeez louise, what a mess! First off, I want to say that this family is one of the coolest families that I've ever known and they've treated me as if I was family, therefore whatever affects them, affects me a way. I met most of the parties involved before the mess and it hurts to see this come down to this, but some in the family are just immature and don't understand their own actions. Let me start off w/ Craig, that is a terrible thing that you've done, doing and probably going to do in the future. You have 2 beautiful kids and you've been fucking around you're whole life (from what I've been told). Grow up! You've destroyed your relationship w/ the Tazumi's, Horiuchi's and most importantly Bryant (well maybe not that important.) But you can still do some good in your life, admit your wrongs, ditch No pubes..and move on. You disgust me frankly, but I think things can change for people...change your life, especially for your kids. Better yet, stay out of their lives until you get your life together. That restraining order is ridiculous and the people that do things like that annoy the shit out of me. Those are the people in life that really make me think that this world is going to be destroyed. To No Pubes, and their family, you are the most god-awful family that I've ever had to hear about and frankly, I think you're the anti-christ. To those who follow Craig and show your loyalties past your family, that's sad. Don't follow the example of someone like that. Don't stick up for someone like that, I truly believe you will regret it in the end.

I was sorry to read about this not only on here, but Ricki's as well. I'm sorry to the family and even though, I don't believe in the violent way in solving things like my good friend Steve, I will always be here and I always got your back. This is to the San Jose and Fresno peeps. Even though I am just a "dirty" korean, I can do some good every so often. =) I'm especially good at giving out smiles!

Everyone, just keep your head up, I truly believe that people will get their just dues. If things don't happen now, believe me, that bad karma will come to Craig and his evil minions.

Sorry Jonathan that your expensive toy isn't working that well. I thought the drawings on your Web site were good regardless. Hopefully things will work out. Speaking of Web sites, mine was recently updated, so take a peek and enjoy! (updates for you Steve)

Pop music - I'll admit I have some pop cd's and I do listen to some trendy sounding music. To me, it's about the beats and if a song has one, I'm with it, no matter who sings it. Sometimes vocals just blow me away, Christina Aguilera is a prime example. Her pipes just amaze me, so that would be another reason why I would listen to it. Some types of music just put you in a good mood, 80's pop. There are many reasons why I would listen to Pop. I'm not always proud to admit it, but it's all good. It's better than Country! j/k

Underdog - I like the feeling of coming from behind and winning...or the feeling of surpassing expectations of others and succeeding. Basketball would be a small example...some wouldn't think that I play with a lot of heart and would be able to pull off some of the things that I do, but I love surprising people. It's one of the best feelings in the world. I like challenges, but here's an oxymoron, I don't like losing. Therefore, if I can't face up to a challenge, sometimes I tend to give up. I need to stop this trend and keep at it. NO Matter how much I could be losing at something, keep at it, finish it off, and do my best. That's all I can ask of myself. I have to stop being such a sore loser. I've gotten better at it with my return week of Socom...at least I think so. Overall, being the underdog is fun if you win or put up a close battle, mostly because I like the respect that you command in the end.

Self - beautification - if you got the money, do it. I personally think it's a waste of time, but that could be because I don't really have self-confidence problems with my looks. I know, I'm no prize, but my looks don't make me feel worse about myself. You live life to make yourself happy and it's sad, but most of this comes about from gaining acceptance from others. We can always say that we don't care what people say, but deep down there is something inside that really does care and is hurt when we hear negative comments from others or if we get rejected due to our looks. I would say getting braces is involved in this..I think I would be one ugly mother F-er if I didn't get them. Would my self confidence be on lower side if I didn't get them? Perchance, but we won't dwell on it, since I did and there's no way to change the past.

Slurs - it's bad that we use them. I don't use 'nigga', but I do look kind of weird at non-black people that use that word, because it just feels like they didn't earn the right to use it. As for 'gay,' it's terrible that we use this word with a negative conotation, but it's just become so widely accepted, it's hard not to use. I say this because we use a word that is a lifestyle that people choose and use it as if it were a cuss word, like saying something is shitty. I would be weirded out if someone said, that's Korean...meaning shitty...hehe...well some crazy japs use it in that sense, but that's ok...they're family =). But I can say that I will try not to use, but in reality, I'll keep using it. It's become second nature and I don't realize I use it. We'll see if I make a conscious effort, but I got other things to worry about.

3 Months until graduation, 4 months until the real world starts. Live it up!

Spring break is coming up soon, I'll be in San Jose most likely a week from this Wednesday, maybe Tuesday, we'll see. I hope to see you all there. Take care....Peace out

Adding on to jon's post about me...

THAT'S RIGHT FUCKERS! DO NOT...I REPEAT..DO NOT PISS ME OFF. I'm not saying this because i'm strong and i can kick ur ass. But lemme put it to you like this. You know how's there's "angry" and then there's "psycho". Yeh the latter would be me. I'm the kind guy who would go crazy on u. Rip off ur ears, kick, punch, throw cinder blocks, scratch, bite, throw my shit if i have to...there are million schools of fighting, and i dont' know any of them. But i will fuck u up. period.

Need more evidence? Aight bitches..look at the pictures to the left. Look at everyone's pic. Notice something???? Who's the ONLY MOTHER FUCKER WHO AINT' SMILING??? That's right. ME. And that cloud? it's always there..and the sun laughing in my face ain't pretty either. I will take out all my fucking agression on u. Even brendan has a little smirk. But not me. I'm all fucking pissed offness.

So come on nopubes. Come on all the people brendan mentioned. Bring it. Bring it on like that movie.

Go ahead. Fuck with my friends. Make you find a good reconstructive surgeon tho. One who's really good at making ears.

Bitch.

[dont worry..this will be the last post about the matter...i'm gonna go train now...hehehehe]

My posts are stupid. True. I was just telling Brendan at lunch today (at a really good ramen shop by Mitsuwa, check it out some time) how I tend to start writing random stuff I think up, then realize that NO ONE CARES AND IT ISN’T INTERESTING TO ANYONE BUT ME (well, I realize it maybe half the time; the other half you guys get to read it and regret ever meeting me.) Anyways, thanks for writing Steve, because I was all set to do the dirty double blog post. There’s more on my mind, so get a picture of one of your favorite stupids, and let those old loving feelings come rushing back in…


Brendan’s crazy family
First let me say I didn’t mean to trivialize the Horiuchis’ situation by completely ignoring it in my last post. And I didn’t really mean to write so much shiet that Brendan’s post would be buried under a fat stinking pile of stupid. The truth is, I wrote much of that before Brendan posted, but I was getting sleepy at the time, and decided to finish it later.

I just have a few semisweet morsels of input…

- I hate when bad things happen to good people. Almost all my friends’ families have been nice and welcoming to me, but I’ve never felt so comfortable in a home other than my own as with the BLuckyDay clan. I can meet some cousin/aunt/little baby for the first time, and already they’re saying, “Oh you’re the nerdy one with the fukdup hands and eyebrows that stop.” … “… yup that’s me, NICE TO MEET YOU.” Ok a little exaggerated, but point is they’ve all been cool (or really open about seriously making fun of me, hmm). Well, whether I am really liked or just a joke, Tomo’s is good stuff and I would never have gotten any without knowing them. So I just hope things work out okay, that people get what they deserve (good or bad), that this doesn’t ruin any relationships among the family members you care about, and especially that the innocent young ones don’t get screwed over this. Yeah I said innocent, so little Sydnie is out. She’s already on my bad side… summuna… =)

- I am amazed and appalled at the stupidity that has been brought to light here. Breaking the law in the most obvious and verifiable ways… turning against people who took you into their family… and the spelling and grammar… ARGGHHH… someone better hold me back, cause I’m about to get a fat Cutco knife for my pen, and it won’t be red til I start marking the circles.

- Steve, it’s nice to see how violently loyal you are to your friends. I’ve gotta warn whoever’s out there even thinking about doing something to piss this guy off. He may seem happy now, what with a girl and APhiO, but he’s got years of rage in reserves… he can just imagine me not holding cookies or some other petty kid shiet, and BAM part of your face is missing and the sixth sense is two beyond what you’ve got. Kids will be reading about it in history books: The Trail of Ears, from San Diego to Fresno. And those kids will be crying.


Fake tats
Okay, I’m a guy. I’m straight. I like looking at shapely women. Large breasts > flat chest. That’s not what this is about.

In the past I’ve been unsure how I felt about plastic surgery and such: breast implants, liposuction, nose jobs, face lifts, hair implants, penis enlargement, double eyelid surgery… any superficial changes people choose to make on their bodies. Actually I know how I feel about penis enlargement: IF SOMEONE NEEDS IT, LET THEM BE, STOP CALLING THEM NAMES [snif... so shmall...] ... Uh... but yeah, it always seemed sad that so many people are somehow motivated to change what they look like. Let’s break it down…

Why we do it - Somehow we develop an idea of what is beautiful and desirable in the face and body. TV, magazines, clothing stores… it doesn’t matter where it came from, most of us want to have it and be surrounded by it. Even if you’re not born or grow up exactly the way you want, there are ways to change yourself and collect the pieces of the “ideal you” puzzle. Nowadays you can buy them, at a grocery store or a medical office. Why would we choose to take such measures? It might be just to like what we see when we look in the mirror. It might be so that others will want to look at us, and be with us. Being what we want on the outside helps us feel more confident on the inside. In other cases, it might even be helpful for career advancement, such as modeling or porn. Ahh porn… now, do you really think I’d be watching if they had normal sized breasts and schlongs? HELL nah!… Did I say I?… I meant YOU. I don't watch that stuff. Pervert.

My perspective - Michael Jackson, who’s had his share of metamorphosis under the knife (perhaps more than his share), said in an interview, “do whatever makes you happy.” My opinion has recently shifted toward his (again realizing the looming threat of hypocrisy, and hoping to dodge its cruel, ignorant grasp). It’s about being able to live every day with some peace of mind, content with who you are, inside and out. I’ve had my share of skin problems (MORE THAN MY SHARE DAMMIT), and sought ways to alleviate this annoyance. Over the years this has probably cost a fair amount of money, all so I would have clearer skin. Clear skin… that’s superficial… so is this any different from someone paying to change another part of the body? So maybe acne is a disease and a small chest isn’t, but I didn’t go to a dermatologist to save my life, it was just to make me feel better about showing my face in public. If every look in the mirror brings you down and makes you curse your genes, no one should tell you you’re wrong to want to change that. “Play the hand you’re dealt,” they might say. If life were fair, and everyone had equivalent problems, this might make sense. But. Shiet. Ain’t. So. You’ve got rich kids who start with every advantage and look like supermodels, poor kids with severe health problems and no hope for the future, and everyone in between. Until you’ve walked in someone else’s shoes, you have NO right to tell them what they should and should not be doing.

This can be compared with clothes, cars, jewelry, and whatever else. Different people use different things to bring their self-image up to a point where they can feel good about or even stand themselves. I don’t like it when my face looks like it should come with a side of breadsticks. Someone else might not like their face without makeup that looks like a raccoon, or when their jeans aren't big enough to fit their skateboard, or when their car doesn’t have an exhaust that can only be plugged with a watermelon. Everyone has their insecurities, and they find their own ways to fill these voids. These differences are what make the world interesting, and everyone has a natural right to try to live happily. So if it’s within your grasp, do what makes you happy. Your reasons can be your own.

Some of these recent posts have been pretty serious. I don’t want you guys to think I’m all preachy proper PC and will never crack a good mean joke again. I’ll still probably make fun of everyone and everything… you can’t take life too seriously. I’m just always thinking, evaluating, and trying to keep an open mind.


Yay, Pooky is back!
that slut ho

two things:

Jon - man ur blog was very analytical, very STUPID, and VERY FUCKING HILARIOUS. If i could only think as quickly as you maybe i could have graduated on time. Nah I doubt that. I wish i could be as PC as u, but you know me. I jump first, and then after i'm shit on the sharp rocks below, THEN i think. Good thing i have friends like u to think for me :-P Heh.

Brendan - okay, so a friend of mine just got cheated on. She loved this guy completely, with all her heart. She was crushed. So then on her blog, I see this letter her friend wrote to the girl that her bf cheat on her with. THe letter is straight up mean. And i thought, "wow. That's really mean". But then again, she deserved it. Anyways, my point is I was amazed at how a person can get so angry over their friend's drama.

BUT NOW I KNOW.

first off, i think this shit is fucking stupid. That NoPube bitch needs to get her ass kicked. And bad. Oh wells, when she's pregnant at 18, i'm sure she'll be the talk of the welfare office. 1st of the month baby! Where them food stamps at????

okay, so i've never tried Tomo's food. oh wait i did. Pretty fucking good. Okay, so i've never been there. But the food was good. So lets see...good food, one of my best friend's family owns it, it's free....ok so that pisses me off. A lot. A LOT. The horiuchi's (well at least the cool ones that brendan was talking about) are cool people. There is a severe lack of cool people in this world. I am not cool. Therefore, i will beat the living SHIT out of people who fuck with my friends.

Let me say that again, just in case any of you fuckwads are reading this. I WILL BEAT THE FUCKING SHIT OUT OF U IF YOU FUCK WITH MY FRIEND. You getting angry yet? Good you cocksucker. Listen, I have nothing to lose. I'm not in your family, and i'm not ur friend. I have just taken a quarter of wingchun kung fu..which qualifies me as a DEADLY WEAPON. If that still doesn't scare you, ask jon about how i feel about ripping people's ears off (the same goes for ur nose). Furthermore, i'm the most angry, pessemistic, immature fucker in the group. Brendan, if you want anyone to have their ass kicked, just let me know. i have a lot of pent up anger from 23 years of stress, so i can assure you they will either be dead or so disfigured you won't be able to tell who they are.

Yes. i'm immature. I'm stupid. But who cares. i'm never gonna grow up. That's for sure. i'm gonna be 18 forever. and 3 mentally.

k nap time for this dumbshit.

More on the slur
Last Saturday, in our late night sleepy stupor, Brendan and I got to talking about the derogatory terms commonly used in everyday speech amongst the populace nowadays…

“nigga” - This is probably the most historically derogatory and controversial word ever. It was used toward slaves, then later against U.S. citizens who were treated like animals because of their skin color. Over time, it became taboo and was shocking to hear spoken out loud. Now you hear it all the time… in music, in movies, at home among friends, and outside at school or even in the public streets. Jackie Chan says, “what’s up my nigga” to a black man in a bar, and the audience of Rush Hour laughs. You hear it so much that you’re numb to it. The meaning has changed for its use in pop culture—it’s used to address or refer to friends or people in general—but surely has not changed for a significant portion of the population, who know their history and will never forget it. Some might say that black people overcame its negativity, since they were able to take a hateful word directed at them and turn it into something positive. But is it acceptable for a person of another race to join in and use the word freely in its new context? White, yellow, brown… you can hear all kinds of people say it. It’s become trendy, largely due to rap music’s increasingly mainstream status and the resulting related-media explosion (MTV, etc.). But get an actual black person within earshot, and 9 times out of 10 the wannabes will hold their tongues. What does this mean? And is it right?

“gay” - This one has had me thinking twice for some time now. It’s become equally common, perhaps more so, to insult someone by calling them homosexual. Gay, homo, fag, faggot, buttlover, ass-pirate, fudgepacker, fruitypie… whatever the term (the list goes on and on), it’s thrown around sometimes to poke fun at a friend, other times to viciously attack an enemy. Many people, considering themselves enlightened compared to past generations, profess their acceptance of all races, religions, and sexual orientations… “it’s a personal choice”, “I'm not gay!... not that there’s anything wrong with that”. But then they turn around and by choosing homosexuality as a form of insult or teasing, automatically place a negative connotation on the word, and through it, the lifestyle and people who fall under that category. Like the “n-word”, you might say that no harm is intended or done, since the meaning has changed over time and through pop culture. Is this the case or are you just making up excuses for yourself?

I’m not preaching in favor of either side here. I’m just hoping to promote thinking. Thinking before speaking. Thinking about the consequences of your actions before you take them. Maybe you’ll come to the conclusion that these words are harmless as long as no one takes offense, and you’ll be careful to keep it that way. Maybe you’ll continue to use them in the privacy of your home or with friends, who know you're just joking around or being stupid. Maybe you’ll continue to use them whenever you damn well please.

In attempt to sidestep blatant hypocrisy here, I must admit that in the past I’ve lightheartedly used both these terms, even though I’ve never held any hateful feelings toward either of the groups designated by them. In the first case, it was always a mockery of the media and others who seem to use the word in the wrong situations. In the second case, I’m sorry to say that I became comfortable using the words to joke around with friends, and even instinctively lash out in anger (i.e. road rage, etc.). No harm was meant, but I have realized that this is one of those things that I’ll look back on and be ashamed of. So in my case, I think it’s time to make a change. The choice is yours as well. Live, learn, and grow.


Pop music
Speaking of going along with hip hop trends… I once sympathized with the anti-pop sentiment generally felt among “real hip hop heads”. I liked to keep it real. Now I’m over it. The truth about music is that any genre will have good and bad, and even then it’s up to you to decide which is which. Sometimes you want mindblowing lyrics, or something to relax to, something to dance to, or something to sing along and cry to while thinking about your ex. Oh Well… that’s why I have a variety of genres in my CD and mp3 collections. You might say pop music is all sellouts. Okay. It is generally designed to appeal to a large audience, and thereby make a lot of money. True. But that doesn't mean the artists don't care about their craft... and some of the producers still come up with good beats and melodies.

A prime example of the pop artist, that I happen to have recently looked into, is Justin Timberlake. N Sync had a lot of fans, a lot of haters, and put out some pretty good songs all at once. I think part of the ridicule comes from their typically predictable romantic pop ballads, and part from jealousy. I can admit that I’d love to be able to sing, and to make a music video, and get rich and have girls adore me. Shiet ain’t so. But when you see someone else achieve something like that, you just might blow up their flaws so you’ll be able to attack them. Okay, at first I seriously thought Justin’s voice was annoying and he wasn’t nearly as good-looking or talented as the panty-throwing girls seemed to think. Some of that has changed and some has not, but I have to give him respect for a few things. First, he’s made smart decisions on who to produce music with, and was able to come up with a good solo album. I downloaded all the tracks from “Justified”, and I like it and I will buy it. Second, he can dance. The N Sync choreographed style wasn’t anything special, but now that he’s on his own it’s his show. He moves really well and his videos are pretty good. I especially like the end of “Like I Love You” where everyone’s just freestyling to the beat. The Neptunes and Timbaland beats are perfect for my style of dance, so when I hear the songs they make me wanna move. Third, his singing isn’t bad. Okay, I’m not saying I love his voice, but I guess I got used to it. And the slow song “Never Again”—obviously produced by Brian McKnight—is really good. Fourth reason for respect: game, and lots of it, apparently. If even half the rumors are true, Justin has done damn well for himself when it comes to getting the ladies. I mean come on… Alicia Keys? Janet?? Alyssa Milano?!… all reason enough to be jealous. And don’t forget he’s even younger than us. Fifth and last, he clearly respects Michael Jackson. His album is a Michael kind of mix of styles, his dance and singing are more and more Michael-inspired. And going back to my original point, how can I claim anti-pop when the King of Pop is and will forever be my all-time favorite.


Underdog Syndrome
I like fair fights, long, close matches, and when an underdog steps up unexpectedly. When Tyson knocks some poor sap out in the first round, that’s not interesting to me. When Rocky is struggling round after round to get Drago for killing Apollo, it’s worth watching. When a basketball game goes into double overtime, I’ll watch it to the end… when the Lakers are ahead by 50 points and Kobe keeps scoring with the foul, I’m changing the channel. You get the idea.

What it is - When it comes to a contest that I’m involved in, I seem to like to overcome a disadvantage rather than start out as the favorite. I call this Underdog Syndrome. I’d take more pride in losing a very close match against a better opponent than in beating someone I was almost sure I would beat. What’d be the point of that? The thrill of victory just isn’t there if there’s no real tension or challenge. But when you win despite a disadvantage, you’ve turned what was relatively little (physical attributes, talent, experience) and used other tools (persistence, willpower, creativity, adaptability) to build it into a lot.

Where it came from - Looking at the conservative, modest tendencies I now possess, I have sometimes reflected on their origins… and come to the conclusion that I have the Florida public school system to blame. Specifically, my first grade teacher. When I was a little kid in first grade, all bullshiet modesty aside, I knew way more than the rest of the class. My parents taught me well, and young. I answered all the questions, eager to show how much I knew, and even corrected the teacher once in a while (yeah, RPS even back then). But one day I was raising my hand to bless the class with knowledge, and my teacher said something like, “why don’t you give the other students a chance to answer.” So I sat quietly. I waited. The answers raced through my head over and over as I sat patiently and quietly for my classmates to come up with something. And this behavior stayed with me. Through middle school. High school. College. I know the answer, but something keeps me from saying it. Old habits die hard, I suppose. It may be hard for some to believe, but I was once an outspoken, chatty, know-it-all young boy. But no longer. I went from loving to dominate and be the center of attention… to sitting back and always giving others a chance to catch up.

What I think of it - There are of course drawbacks to Underdog Syndrome. I’m not as aggressive and enthusiastic about winning and achievement as I could (should?) be. It’s almost like I don’t care… or I’ve become comfortable with not winning. I’m not saying I lose all the time, but you could interpret this as my giving myself outs… making an excuse in case I lose: “well of course I lost, the other guy’s obviously better than me.” I’ve also noticed that I might even subconsciously hurt my chances of winning just so I have a long, close match, and give the other person a chance. You might even call me a choker. When I’m about to win, I might throw it away when it doesn’t make any sense. Playing tennis not long ago, I was up 5-2 in the second set, ready to close out the match, but ended up not winning until it was 7-5. In pool, you’ve probably seen me have a good lead then miss an easy shot on the 8-ball. Someone who thrives on domination would always try to win as quickly and by as much as possible. If they are able to maintain this kind of performance, they will be hugely successful and recognized for it. Underdog Syndrome sets me up for the toughest battle possible… against my opponent and against myself.

Here’s where my affinity for the classic video games comes in. Back in the days of big fat pixels and simple beep sounds, game designers had very little to work with. Somehow they came up with a whole lot of entertaining games with charming-if-not-photorealistic graphics and catchy, exciting, and memorable music. Put simply, they made a lot out of a little. It’s like looking back on the original Star Wars trilogy and comparing it to, say, The Matrix. Game producers nowadays have amazing processing power, graphics and sound capabilities at their disposal. Some are still coming up with some great and innovative games, which I definitely respect. But there’s just something about that Mega Man music that makes me think, “man, it takes a genius to arrange beeps and boops into sweet music like this.”

Going back to competition, I have noticed the differences in how we individually tend to handle it. Some of us love to dominate from start to finish. Others of us absolutely cannot stand to lose (or even be behind). As I’ve said, I don’t mind being behind so long as there’s a chance I can come back to win (or fight the good fight). I’m not saying anything else on this right now; it’s just interesting how our different personalities come together and interact in competitive situations.


Blood – Warning: Explicit content
Tuesday the Bloodmobile came to the parking lot at my workplace. I don’t like needles, but I don’t have a dreadful fear of them either, so I figure it’s worth some short-lived pain to give something back to the medical community. I went in after a nice hearty lunch (last time I gave blood I barely ate or drank earlier in the day, and got very lightheaded)…

my experience - I filled out the form and answered their questions. A quick click came with a prick to my left middle finger. Blood iron level okay, I then reclined in a window seat with my left arm extended, because I had developed a little rash near the entry point on my right. Blood pressure gauge on arm? Check. Cleaned and coated in iodine? Check. I squeezed their sponge thing a few times, and they marked my vein with a little metal circle imprint thing. I was looking at my arm, interested in seeing what goes on, but the nurse (or whatever they are) told me I should probably look out the window, and take a deep breath. Fair enough. POKE. Ouch. That didn’t feel good, but the worst is over, right? Squeeze the sponge every 5-10 seconds and relax. “It’s going, but really slow.” What? Without warning, they shifted the needle a bit. OW.

I remember we had a blood drive in high school, and a girl in my after-lunch Spanish class had obviously been crying. She explained that she went to give blood, but they kept missing the vein, so they tried poking her several times and moving the needle around while it was in her skin. It didn’t end up working, they gave up, and all she had to show for her pain was a sticker that said “I tried.”

Luckily they didn’t poke me over and over, but instead… “maybe we should try the right arm”… “is it okay if we start over with your right arm?”… “… sure.” I don’t believe this. I’m getting needled in both my arms, it damn sure better work this time. Same thing as before, only now my right arm is out and my left arm is kept company by a little bandage, gauze wrap, and an ice pack. Look out the window, pokeOW. “It’s going much faster on this side.” Good. Squeeze the sponge, try to think of something other than that tube with a steady stream of dark red fluid being drained from your body, squeeze the sponge, hope that nothing goes wrong, squeeze the sponge, hope they don’t forget about me and take more than they’re supposed to. It was over pretty quick though, so I had another gauze wrapped elbow, a short rest with some free apple juice, and I was on my way.

my thoughts - There’s something about giving blood that makes me paranoid. It’s not about the medical practitioners, but rather the paper with “symptoms to watch for” that they give you. Fever of 100.5°F or more. Headache, eye pain, body aches, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, skin rash on the trunk of the body? If I got any of these I would freak the hell out. All I wanted to do was help a fellow human out, and the price I pay for philanthropy is being hot, puking and scratching my love handles while I have the runs? Fortunately all that's developed so far is some slight bruising.

Another thing… they asked me if I’ve been to the UK lately. If I am a woman who is pregnant (and waited for me to answer). If I am a male who has ever had sex with another male. This got me thinking about STDs and how they’re transmitted. It seems weird to me that men can get them from women or other men. Blood or bodily fluids, huh. So… there’s fluid entering the body through the penis? Really? That just seems weird that it can work that way, since the organ seems designed for expulsion. And for male-male sex… does that mean the fluid must be blood? And why is it so much more likely HIV will be transferred via anal sex? Like I said, I had to think about something while they drained the life outta me, and their questions piqued my curiosity.

On a final, loosely related note… Coldplay has a lyric in their song “Yellow” that goes, “for you I’d bleed myself dry.” One day while listening to it I realized just how really gruesome a thought that is. I’m not sure if the song is supposed to be romantic or what… but that’s not how I like to hear love, loyalty, admiration, or whatever else expressed.


Creativity returns?
I finally got myself a tablet, pretty much like Brendan’s. It came yesterday, and I was really excited opening it up… like Christmas when we were kids, seriously. Of course it’s a bit more expensive than the toys I got back then, so I used special care not to drop it or scratch it or let anyone else breathe on it. Anyways, I feel really eager to do some drawing and coloring with it, and this weekend or next I plan to do my Web site layout (or at least get it well on its way). Who knows, before you know it I Love Stupid might actually have a link to that piece.


… Peace…

Haha

What up...

Long time no blog, but here we are again...saying HAPPY B-DAY BRENDAN! Welcome to the old people's club. It's hella funny how you're the 2nd youngest among us in Pooky, yet your b-day is in March. Derek you're the little baby in this group, live up your younger years.

You're welcome for Splinter Cell, I hope it gives you hours on enjoyment. It seemed like a lot of fun, well, the time I played it at least haha. NO BULLETS?!? BODIES FOUND!??! haha. What's up stealthy Resident Evil haha.

Steve, are you coming home for Spring Break at all? I don't want to see you is the reason why I ask. haha...Brian will you be making an appearance as well or is your Spring Break different from ours? I'm not going to even ask Brendan when his is because I know he doesn't know/doesn't care because his whole school career is one big spring break. I'm going to be home from probably Tuesday or Wednesday on, I think I'm going snowboarding the first weekend and then to LA for Linkin Park. I also got tickets w/ Tiffany to see Good Charlotte and New Found Glory, but after I bought them she told me she might have a formal that weekend...GOD DAMN IT! haha. So if I can't go I have two tickets for anyone ...Ricki...looking at you...hehe. If we can go, buy a ticket and go w/ us anyway!

High stakes poker? Hmm...well you'll probably have to count me out since I get pissed off losing 5 dollars, imagine if I lost 50. I'll play videogames waiting for Steve's arrival. Pokerroom is pretty fun, it's a good time killer and you don't lose any real money, so win win, situation. I haven't played it in a while, but it's all good. I do want to go to Vegas though, summer maybe? I think we should take a trip somewhere, preferably before July 14th because that's when I start working, wheeee! Real world approaching fast, make it stop!!!!!!

School is actually fun right now, I'm definitely going to miss it. I guess I'll just have to live it up the next 3 months because after that the party stops. If you haven't visited and want to, this is your last chance. But don't stay for 10 days like Jonathan, and make sure you have a reliable ride home. =) j/k Not looking forward to coming home and being my parent's slave until I start working, then I'm weekend slave. =)

Steve, you're a freakin Nomad! You move like every month. haha. I hope this new place treats you well. I like your blog on Filipinos, generalizing at all? or does that apply to all of them?

It's funny how I'm the only one not Japanese or even part Jap in this bloggy thing. I was talking w/ Danielle about how I hated (literally hehe j/k) Japanese people and then she reminded me that my best friends are all Japanese, the people I hang out w/ at home are all Japanese, I'm always at a Japaneses person's house, my girlfriend is Japanese, there seems to be a trend here...I don't really get it...but I'll figure it out soon. GO KOREANS! haha Tony and Michelle can represent w/ me at the Horiuchi household. Quiet Steve and Brendan, I know you two are the biggest Korean haters out of all them haha =)

Those sodas Brendan talked about are pretty good, especially the Fruit Punch. I stocked up on sodas for finals week and realized I only have one and it's going to be hella easy...oops...oh well! I did pretty bad on a final yesterday, but I cheered myself up by buying shoes. 40 dollar TMacs...Money! Kevin has gotten me addicted to online shopping, that bastard! I've boughten stuff from Eastbay, Half.com, Ebay, and Amazon in the past week. Dear god, take my debit card away!

A shoutbox is a good idea, Admin get on it, and hurry!

Those arcade games are tight, bring back old memories about how much money I used to waste pumping quarters into a machine. Damn, those were the good ol' days. I haven't downloaded this MAME thing yet, but I will when I get some free time.

If it makes you feel any better, I don't remember anything from YBA either. hehe...Please show me the pic of Lori on the beach. I love it!

Vietnamese dancing festivals...whoa! It's an interesting experience. It's like Obon, minus the good food and tons of Vietnamese being spoken. Loudly, I might add. They had a beauty pagent which was pretty cool...but I didn't understand a lick of what was being said. Note to self, if I ever go again, which I probably will not, I will bring a translator. The funniest/saddest thing of the night was this guy was trying to sing the national anthem (US) and his mic wouldn't work for like 3 times he tried singing and when he finally got to sing the whole thing, his voice cracked badly on multiple parts. Terrible. Singing is hard, especially with those high notes.

Which leads me to say, props to Steve for the singing thing. That's awesome. If you want to go karaoke singing, give me a few drinks and I'm down baby! Jon and I can sing Backstreet Boys again...oh baby!

I do like Brendan's idea for younger pics of us. I can find some dope ones when I'm at home. I always have the one w/ Brendan and I on my Web site w/ his legs being crossed like a little girl. I am definitely curious to see what these guys looked like. I've seen pics of Derek though, chubby fat kid hehe j/k.

I'm glad so far, Brendan and Jonathan have been nice to Tiffany. I'm glad she already doesn't take Brendan seriously. That's the first step in meeting my friends hehe. And Brendan, how many people do you think read my Guestbook hehe...why don't you plug your site a little more a-hole! I'll put a link on my AOL profile, maybe more people will see it there and I can stop seeing MENTALABSTRACTION.COM a million times!

Andy is one the funniest guys I know. He says stuff that I just don't understand sometimes, but it's funny. He makes random statements with every intention of getting a laugh from someone and he knows when his jokes suck hahah.

Alright, well that's enough of this thing. I will talk to you all soon, hopefully Spring Break...Carrows!?

B Lee Dat Out....(Bao Gao Boon King...MAN DOWN!)

challenge:

watch Rounders and fight the urge to play poker.

I recently joined pokerroom and am trying to learn how to play Texas Hold 'em. I'm playing with play money of course because i have no real money, unlike u ballers. I would like to someday go to Vegas and play poker with all the old scrubs there and see if i can get some money. Blackjack and let 'em ride are okay, but i think poker would be more fun to play. Cuz i'm playing against other scrubs...not the casino.

I was gonna go to vegas this spring break, but i find myself with no money whatsoever. This is because i have to move AGAIN. Putting down various rents and security deposits do not help one's financial status. It sucks really, having 2.50 in your checking account. Eating has become somewhat of an emegency - everyday i have to think "how am i going to eat". On the other hand, it makes every day more exciting.

Finals is once again upon me, and i find that i have yet to start reading. Like i give a shit about japanese post war politics anyway. All i know is they make good ice cubes (perfect cubes), and that's the bomb.

Brendan - nothing wrong with food stamps, or generic food. You'll get used to the mayo sandwiches too. Add a cucumber to that and you got a party.

we should add a shoutout box to the blog. That way people who read this can post their unimportant thoughts or stupid comments.

I think i might be coming home some random week in the future. If i do, I would sure hope that we can get a poker game going. And a high stakes one at that. Maybe like 50 bucks or somehting like that. I figure we're all rich boys now. Except for me. I'll take the role of that washed-up guy who's putting the last few bucks on the lines, hoping that he'll hit the jackpot and then maybe he can finally super size his meal and McD's.

Rock on. Time to go eat my roommates food. Hey we all gotta survive somehow, right?

"strong like bull"

The dreaded double blog. The "pay attention to me" blog. The "my life is obvoiusly more important than your life will ever be because of all the cool shit that happens to me" blog. All above are true of the following blog. Let's go.

So apprently now my family is collecting food stamps since everywhere I look in the kitchen I see the same shit we usually have only this time now all the packages say, "Safeway's..." and "Crunchy crunchy frosty bran" and "100% carrot substitute". So I've decided that since I'm hungry and I'm too lazy to walk or drive to good old Del that I would eat and drink some of these other brands of quote, unquote food. For the first part of this exciting and breathtaking series I will start with the Safeway Select sodas. A quick run down of what they have to offer and what they are lacking. Fun times start now.

Cherry Cola - Mmmmm. Pepsi too syrupy, Coke not syrupy enough. Safeway Cherry Cola - BOOMSHAKALAKA!
Doctor Skipper - Haha. Makes me laugh. Very close to the orginal with a hint more of cherry I think. Overall I think I like this better than Pibb.
Pineapple - Whoa pineapple soda...wait a minute...it has a nice overall body and a nice nose. Like Jon commented when he drank it, "ooh it doesn't give me that weird feeling in my mouth". Well I have no idea what that or nose and body means. Not too acidy, just right. Not for all, but pretty quenching nonetheless.
Grapefruit - Tasted like Squirt. Since this is 50 times cheaper I would have to say Grapefruit over Squirt anyday.
Mountain Breeze - Code Red Mountain Dew. I'm actually starting to not like Code Red myself and this is more of the same. Although the cherry in this soda tastes like you are given a glass of regular mountain dew and then the bartender actually puts in that cherry syrup. I like that better than already mixed in. Tastes better. However when I burp I get a hint of cherry flavored nyquil. As long as you don't burp you'll be fine. With the sodas and the ladies.
Black Cherry - Mmm. I like this one. It is very good and reminds me of Hanson's soda. However a little on the sweet side but not too harsh.
Fruit Punch - With Hawaiian punch I always finish it off to quickly because it doesn't have carbonation in it. Well this fruit punch does and it is delicious. It's a nice break from drinking the other punch in about 30 seconds, plus that one leaves your teeth slimy and red.

Well I think that about wraps it up on the sodas. Hopefully next blog I will be able to try new and exciting flavors! OH man keep the fun times rolling please...

*IF YOU ARE NOT GOOD AT ARCADE GAMES CAUSE U SUCK (NOT AGAINST JON THOUGH CUZ HE'S A STRATEGY GUIDE NERD) THEN SKIP THIS SECTION.*

MAME - For those who don't know what this is it is an emulator for old arcade games. Everything you played as a kid is available to you in PERFECT arcade glory. No retarded load times, no retarded missing frames of animations, no stupid voice announcers that were watered down for console hardware. Here is the rundown of the games that I downloaded for a splendid good time with RPS aka Bangs. Feel free to get jealous. CYBERBOTS. SAMURAI SHOWDOWN 2, SAMURAI SHOWDOWN 4, SSF2TURBO, METAL SLUG 3 (Jon added up how many quarters we would have pumped into this God forsaken, money grubbing machine and it totaled about 25 dollars. Hey beats 200 dollars if you bought it in the stores), SUPER PUZZLE FIGHTER TURBO, STRIDER, DARKSTALKERS, NIGHTWARRRIORS, GAUNTLET, TMNT, SIMPSONS, OLD SCHOOL STAR WARS IN VECTOR GLORY, Q*BERT, TECMO SUPERBOWL, AND MOONWALKER. Jon decided he wanted to try DBZ. This game sucks but you should download it to see the dinosaur in the background. You'll know what I mean. Check it out. Now be appreciative, well not towards me, but to Ari for searching through foreign pages with a bunch of german shit on it just to find a legit site with legit ROMS. I would actually reccomend that you have a semi-fast computer. Even though the roms are small, the processor still gets eaten up by them. So here we go. If you want them follow the steps. Like I said these are perfect. Jon seemed impressed and we know how he scoffs at videogames. Oh yeah and I won't see him anymore since he has to beat CYBERBOTS with all characters...Steve da' nickname is'lacken and Farmer Bri understand what I'm saying. I think Bangs downloaded a strategy guide with little icons of cheese on each combo. Watch out for him.

First you have to get the emulator itself. You can get this here at - http://www.classicgaming.com/mame32/download.htm Download the zip and extract it to your newly created MAME folder. I think there are three downloads...you want the m32-062.zip file. You need to sign up with Gamespy to get your file. Don't worry its free.

Now for the ROMS. A couple of things to note. YOU LEAVE THEM ZIPPED. DO NOT EXTRACT. When you download these have them get saved in the /Rom folder of the extracted MAME emulator. Also if you are downloading a game that is based on a older game engine, for example, SSF2Turbo edition, you need to get the PARENT ROM of SSF2 since turbo was based on the regular SSF2. Now for the sites: http://mamefans.metropoliglobal.com/mw.htm Again you have to register with them to download but it's free. Now the download times are very slow. I haven't figured out a way to use a download accelerator yet, but like I was saying. The biggest ROM size I have is 75 megs and that is for Metal Slug 3. The Simpsons is a whopping three megs. Another site but one I don't go to often : http://www.kemuland.com/welcome.php When you finally get all the ROMS you want then you have to open up MAME and go to the File/Audit all ROMS for it too detect the ROMS you just downloaded.

Now for controllers. You can use the keyboard but guess how well that works. Try using the arrows for a dragonpunch...and if your player one you have to use some shit like W, T, X, F just to do a fucking dragonpunch. So yeah, you might be saying...I thought you said it was free...well if you look at my list and how much those games go for...well I saved myself at least 10K. I think I can spend 10 bucks on a controller. I'd recommend Gravis since Windows and Mac have drivers for them already. Then when you see your ROM (you'll know what I mean when you see it) then you have to right click and enable the joypad for every game you want to use the controller for. Any questions email me.

Remember if you don't want to wait to download these I have the ROMS on my hardrive that you can copy. *Hint hint, Jon...download shit I don't have...* They even have that Miss World Nude game that is exactly like Qix but you get pictures of naked girls instead of stupid Qix shit. Haha and no I haven't downloaded that...yet.

So Jon and I were talking about how we can't remember shit from YBA conferences...shit I already forgot what I was going to say...maybe Jon can cap that off...

Vietnamese dancing festivals are stupid and insulting. I am a firm beleiver that humans are the superior race therefore we shouldn't let monkeys dance without a leesh or a guy with a top hat controlling them or else they might start to think they are superior and start getting ideas. Oh well...if they do we can always do my DDR machine attached with a claymore in the jungle plan to blow them out in 20 seconds flat. Don't know what I'm talking about. Go to my last T-Bola conversation and replace "scattegories" with "to a traditional dancing vietnamese show". MINUS 10,000 POINTS. Fuck that hole is getting deep.

Racist words: The race with the slur can use it anyway they want. Other races cannot. Don't agree? Tell me otherwise.

Well thats about it. Funny how this blog contains no deep thoughts. Just a simple way to get all the memories in the endangered species of arcades on our computer for free, there by helping the arcades become extinct...haha this is great.

OH yeah, thanks Bryant for Splinter Cell...since I can download new levels, it truly is the gift that keeps on giving. Kinda like T-Bola in that my jokes will never run dry as long as you hang out with her!! =) This is awesome! Haha. Whee Fun times. Oh yeah real quick...another idea...I think we should all email Jon with our most embarrasing, young picture of ourselves so he can put them up for like a week on our blog. This came about because I have only seen Bryant as a young kid in elementary. I have no idea what Steve, Brian, Jon or Hapachan looked like for that matter. Tell me what you think...aren't you curious to see what I looked like? Maybe not...

Okay I had to edit this blog because the Links button wasn't working...so they are in bold...copy and paste your damn selves you lazy bastards.

Today Brendan rewarded himself by purchashing a lot of movies that he wanted. Brendan is very happy right now. Brendan is making popcorn. Brendan is ecstatic right now. The list goes: The Ring, Ringu, Donnie Darko, Full Frontal and Road to Hell..ahem Perdition. Lets talk about these choices shall we because I just came from a fucked up class where we analyze film for fun...except it's no fun. Its retarded. No offense to you guys.

The Ring: If people didn't think it was scary that is fine. I thought it was. I like psychological thrillers than typical horror. That is just me. I also find it interesting how if people didn't like it...they probably saw it after the hype and told themselves that it is not scary so they can play devil's advocate. Just like me and American Pie 2. Ask the hapa...i mean Korean...everyone said it was funny. I said it was fucking stupid. I didn't laugh once. Don't believe me. Ask him. It might be because I wanted to feel special in my own little way so I told myself, "I'm not going to like it cause it's stupid". I think Jon can vouche for me when we played that stupid YBA game where they had to make people smile. I win. So whatever. If there is anything I learned in that cinema classes is that everyone has their opinions...I also learned that most people's opinions are fucking stupid.

Ringu: Finally. Presented in all its Nip glory. No dubbed here my friend and digitally remastered just for me. I can't wait to watch it considering the little clip I did see of it...it seemed darker and scarier. I'll let you know after I check it out.

Donnie Darko: Ari is making me watch this. It is a psychological thriller about a guy who gets visited by a killer rabbit and gets his past and future revealed. A killer rabbit? I already like it.

Full Frontal: I am a Soderbergh whore. He shot some sequences with a Canon XL-1 camera...the same one I was looking at but it was a tad expensive...around 5 grand...but I didn't invest in it because no fucking store around here carried such cameras...so I couldn't see it in action...so I finally get to see what makes this digital camera the best one out there...Soderbergh said it was dope...so I say it is dope. If you are laughing because I'm a whore...well who liked Ocean's 11. And soon to be released...Ocean's 12...with original cast...Don Cheadle better speak a lot more...or we are in Barney.

Road to Perdition: Most of you guys have seen this. The guy who shot the movie, Konrad Hall, died recently. The same guy who shot Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. I like that movie a lot. If you haven't seen it...I recommend you doing so if you think that Westerns are a tad dry. Just picture the movie, The Sting in the desert.

On to more important things: T-bola likes her name? Thats' fucking awful. Well at least she concedes it. I know what she is thinking too...she is thinking...if I can get BLuckyDay to like me then he will be nice to me, so I will say his nickname is great and funny. Haha. Dreams they are shattered. Then she will go on to give me a nickname because she thinks nicknames are cute...

"Yo T-bola pass the shoyu now"
"Haha you are very funny Brendan"
"No shit."
"In fact lets all give each other nicknames..."
"...yeah sure."
"Here is the shoyu...B-BOLA" (followed by an annoying laugh with her hand covering her mouth)
"...yeah thanks...I guess"
"Haha now we are all friends! Lets go play Scattegories!"
"You are a dolt"
"What's a dolt..."

Well T-Bola...you can try it...but you will be slaughtered...I don't usually trash my own kind...but I will fuck a Nip up. Anyhoo...glad you like it! Although if everyone keeps calling you that...i better think of a new name for you! Hehe. If you take offense to this...Haha.

Brian's birthday huh? Who is this myserioso, dark figure, known as Brian? Oh well...Happy Birthday. Hope it was a D - D - Rightious birthday. Haha...hallmark here I come.

Steve likes M.A.! Thanks for the input! I'm glad you like it...I figure anything with motion tweening will make any flash whore happy! Cause I sure am! Haha...I can tell when Steve visits because I only have 5 hits with a Mac Operating system! Haha! Anyways thanks Steve...remember to keep plugging it all over the net...I'm sure some of your asian brothers like KKreuk...

"A lot going on... but there always is, isn't there: a lot going on."

Fake birthday on the old ranch
Yeah, it's late now, but happy birthday B3 after the fact anyway. I'll get you a present if you ever come back home again you chucka mofucka. Heheh get a new job, and save up for Nihon, seriously. Or just multiply paperz on PokerRoom. Hope it was a good one. See you next Thanksgiving.

SLO
Thanks to Bryant for providing me with a place to sleep and fruit juice aplenty. It was an interesting weekend. My highlights:

I got to stay an extra night, yay! My coworker Eric was my ride, and I ended up not seeing him for the whole weekend. I often wondered if he was okay, since he didn’t respond to my numerous messages and was doing a lot of mountain biking. On the way down Friday morning, he told me that his sister was thrown in jail for public drunkenness the night before. Sunday night I hear from him around 10pm and apparently the shiet happened again. And he had to go pick her up, but only after the minimum four hour processing period. So we left this morning around 7am and I have two hours of work to make up.

Andy said some hilarious shiet. Observing that Bryant’s car makes a noise like a small animal... claiming that the unicycle that we saw a guy riding on the sidewalk is mythical, like a unicorn... singing an 80s song and telling Tiffany that it was from before she was born… unfortunately I can’t claim to know him that well, but Andy cracks me up.

Saw Kevin again, met Kent, got to know Tiffany a little bit better. What nice people all around. Kevin made some bold statements about challenges at the pool table. It was kinda weird meeting someone named Kent… Heath Ledger has never been so faded. While Bryant was passed out at Denny’s, T-bola was friendly enough to ask me some questions … how long I’m staying in SLO, do I have beads, etc.… about 5 times each. Alcohol is a brain killer people. But it’s all good, at least she tried. And she seems to really like her BLucky-given nickname. Everyone wins, eh!

Nerd action
Steve's puzzle... whoever uses it doesn't ever see it? So they're blind or dead...?

A coffin - Although this doesn't work in the weird case that someone decides they want to choose or even buy their own coffin ahead of time. Now that's gotta be the ultimate in superficiality. Or if the afterlife lets you look down on the living and watch your own funeral. But then why would you do that when you can see naked people.

A white cane - This is making some politically incorrect assumptions: (a) blind people can't be taught to make canes, (b) blind people are powerless to go out and buy things for themselves. So a friend or family member would have to fetch their guidestick for them, and never play "blind man" and use it for fun. A stretch? Perhaps.

etc. - I could sit here and let the nerd brain come up with a dozen more, each justified more weakly than the last. But I won't.

If I'm right, I better get that 151 and pho, you cheap bastard. And even if I'm not right... shiet... HEY STEVE MERRY CHRISTMAS.

btw
Full Circle sucked and was the biggest disappointment ever. Now let’s have at that dick.
I am special.

Stay tuned for next time… the reason behind my love for the classic video games.

“Get the fuck outta here.” “Understood.”

happy birthday brian. I'll get you a present. What do you want? Chicken, shrimp, beef, or "regular"? heh. And if i ever see you again, i'll get it to yah. Welcome to the old club. Pretty soon we'll all need walkers and we'll become bitter old men.

sorry i haven't been blogging lately. i've been pretty busy lately with a lot of stuff. I just recently spent a shitload of time learning how to sing in a four part harmony setting. The curse of having a "barry white-like" voice pays off when you want to sing cuz you get the bass part, which means that you don't have to sing the hard parts..or so i thought. Anyways, I had to learn the bass parts for "this i promise you" by nsync, and "in the still of the night" which was best performed by Boyz II Men. It was pretty fucking hard. I had to do it for a fraterntiy function. It really sparked my interest in singing however. I'm currently getting together with a group of peoples every week and learning new songs. The currently song I'm trying to learn is "a better man" by All 4 One. It's an awesome song. I would recomment that you all d/l it right now and listen to it. I'm also trying to learn that one melodious part in "Motownphilly". It's the part right after "yo mike, check this out. See if this one moves you". It's hella @#$@ hard. Trying to learn all of this as given me so much more respect for Boyz II men...for them to be able to sing the way they do is nothing but pure, unclogged, uncut, untarnished TALENT. Man they're dope. And all the critics that said that "Full Circle" sucked or was the biggest disappoint ever can suck my dick.

Brendan. I think you should take ur website to see a doctor cuz that shit is sick. Get it? I really like the plot for the poker game movie too. We should also make it very realistic (i.e. Bryant/I lose all our money, Bryant gets mad, I leave to play video games, Jon takes everyone's money, etc.) I also think the fridge in the garage should play a major role, as should the felt, and jon's clay chips (well aren't you special????)

One more week and then i'm moving again. I just live too fucking far from campus, and with the price of gas these days, we all agreed to move closer to UCSD. Plus i'll be closer to the school gym, which means i'll get my FAT ass to work out. I'm so fucking out of shape i often wonder how i dont' puke every time i take a shower.

I was watching the world series of poker on Espn. It immediately made me want to go to vegas. Those are some big ass pots they got in those games. I swear I wish i could go watch one. And then one of the guys spills his chips and one rolls off to the side. And then he's so fucking bling bling and baller and he's like "shit whatevers i dont care. I got this ugly shirt and that's just fine. Okay i'm gonna get up and walk around and look like i'm nervous and cool at the same time". And then the chip would roll against my foot and i would pick it up and be like "oh shit 10,000 dollars". and then i would go to the buffet at Paris and just to show everyone how bling i am i would eat one shrimp and then leave. oh yeh. oh. yeh.

two apprent laws you must follow when playing in the world series of poker:
1)you must dress EXTREMELY ugly. Not just ugly. But UNLAWFULLY ugly. So ugly that your own parents would refuse to say that you're their child and your dog would cringe when he looks at u. The clothes/personal fashion (i.e. haistyle) that these people exhibit is absolutely amazing. How they got to the casino, out of their car and into the casino without getting their ass kicked is beyond me.
2) if you have no ugly clothes, come in your most ghetto outfit ever. Okay, so if you don't have ugly clothes, then pick out the cheapest thing in your closet. Some old dirty jeans, maybe a free tshirt you got from a job fair or a cheap store in tahoe or something.

what i especially liked is how pissed the guy looked who got last place. He trudged over to the money counter and got his 100,000 and left. THAT POOR SOUL. Only 100,000. Even i shed a tear for him. It's tragic, really.

i'm gonna go shave now. Fuck i hate shaving. But the shaving gel smells so good, so it's all gravy.

Finally, i have a riddle for all of u:
(A free home-run pie for whoever guesses it. Except Jon. He's a nerd, so he has an advantage. I'm not gonna be a punk tho. So if Jon wins, he gets a free bowl of pho, but only after he drinks three shots of 151, and has an ice cold glass of water)
Whoever makes it, doesn't need it.
Whoever buys it, doesn't use it
and whoever uses it, doesn't ever see it.
What is it?

Damn you guys for making me double blog, but I just wanted to say Happy B-day to Brian. I wasn't sure which day to do it since he's a weird Leap Year baby. What's that make you like 5 years old? haha j/k

Jonathan and I are having a blast in SLO. He got to watch me pass out, yay! If anyone else wants to experience that kind of fun, let me know.

Brendan = hilarious/gay and stupid to the max. The pics stay and you know you love em. Your Web site is sick, few links don't lead to anything, not even a "Coming Soon" or it could be because I was too lazy to let them load, who knows?

Steve - Stevie T, Steveore, Creme Pizzity to the Hizz-A, CB - Cookies and Beer, SD Playa Hata...any of these good your majesty? haha j/k. Sorry if you took offense, I guess we should come up with something better. Thanks for the scolding us though. haha...Seriously though, sorry about that. Don't feel old, when you're wrinkley and shit then I might want to hear your whining on the whole old thing haha. We're still young and we have so much ahead of all of us. I'm excited to see what the future has in store for all of us.

If it makes you feel any better my nick names suck too, Mr. Beisbol, LL Cool B, Dirty Korean...but I like em because friends came up with them. Especially the Dirty Korean one, I can't think of a more fitting name for myself.

Old men and the bathroom...first of all I think public bathrooms are absolutely the filthiest places on Earth. I hate using them and I only use them if totally necessary. I rarely take a shit in them for that very reason being dirty and the disgusting old men. IBM had tons of em and I'm sure I'll hear plenty more of them. I guess most of them have no one to impress but still...a little courtesy please?

Joe Millionaire - I didn't watch the whole series, so I'm not sure what happened with everything. I saw the middle espisode and the last one. The whole time I was thinking this guy is an idiot, how can any of these girls like him...like one of things where you see dumb ass guys w/ gf's. But in the end, he seemed like a nice guy, just not the smartest guy in the world, but that's ok. Would any of you guys ever go on one of these shows? I wouldn't, just doesn't seem like the best way to meet girls...but 500K...I dunno...haha.

I was actually pleasantly surprised that Brendan was nice to her...but he was half asleep...so I don't know if there will be another meeting haha. No she doesn't know this URL yet, my Web site or my Xanga...so she'll have to wait to see my "asshole" side. Thanks for having a hatemail thing go to me, I've gotten like a million e-mails because of Brendan. He did tell the truth about one thing, she is really nice and I'm sure you all will like her.

Alright, it's almost Socom time, so everyone take care...Peace out yo!

God I'm hilarious...ugh...haha funny stuff...ugh...is this what I have come too?

Haha! Steve posts twice to make it look like he wrote more! Sneaky bastard.

Creampuff = Temporary name. Most of us came up with our own names and had some say in it. What do you think we are creative? Shit have you seen Jon? Haha. So Steve I will stop calling you by your temporary name...which I still find funny. But the truth is you got that name cause we have fucking clue what to call you...but I'll start thinking...consider it a birthday present. =)

Aight that's it. No more publishing twice now!