Whee... Time to double blog, just to make up for lost time in the past... (This was actually going to be posted earlier, but uh... stuff came up :D)
Who needs to save money anyway? I saved up since the beginning of the year, and went crazy on buying stuff this last month... Let's see where to start... Picked up Linkin Park and Evanescence CD yesterday. (I got the Evanescence CD at the suggestion of one of my friends, and Bryant's Xanga!) I haven't been listening to the radio at all so I didn't know what to expect from it. I actually like it a lot. I can't find a bad track on here. Score another for Rock... The song Taking Over Me is goooood! As for the Linkin Park album... I enjoyed it, despite my hate for screaming. I didn't like their first album (Yeah, I'm probably the only one.) but this one has some good beats. Both gets thumbs up from me.
One Hour Photo... That movie with Robin Williams? Don't see it. It's not what I expected at all. It's neither scary or thought provoking. It's just stupid. But hey... We all love stupid, right?
Next... the Gameboy SP. I've been holding out so long without a handhold gaming system (The Neo Geo Pocket doesn't count. I have A game for it.). I've been missing out! Advance Wars kicks so much ass... I ordered puzzle fighter, and I should be getting a call any minute now... But with the addition to the SP, my Cube got better... I can finally hook this up with the 'Cube for some Zelda fun. Zelda is actually a lot of fun. I'm not very far, but I like the camera a lot more in this game. I'm also now a fan of cell shaded graphics! I could watch Link's facial expressions all day... Unfortunately, I haven't had a lot of time to play... Stupid school. I can't wait to get out. OH WAIT. I have a whole 'nother year. ARGGG... I'm ready to leave this school behind. Happily spring break is just around the corner... BUT I HAVE TO WORK. Damn it all...
So yeah, it's almost business as usual now... I actually feel better after writing that last log... Getting stuff out in the open is good sometimes... hehe, now if only I could do that in person.
Apr 3, 2003
Apr 1, 2003
Wow... A few days later, and my world is turned upside down. As with Brendan, I'm going to put a warning here; it's going to be long and boring. You'll probably think i'm strange, but here we go. (No it's no April Fools joke... Damn whoever made this "Holiday" up.)
This past weekend, I actually ended up talking with Lori... She called me one day and things went from there. The past week has actually been a pretty big blur. I remember getting a call and an e-mail and I set up a meeting for lunch on Monday.
During the phone conversation, the whole relationship thing gets brought up. You know, past relationships and such... It was really something I didn't want to know... But at the end of it, she says she's tired of being single. How the hell am I supposed to interpret that one? On one hand she paints a picture of her happiness these past years, and then basically states that she's looking for someone special. Ugh.
So Monday comes by. I have to pick her up from work for her lunch break. I get to the door, and I knock. I hear her voice. It sounds the same. I freeze for a second or two... I want to open the door and see her, but another part is a little afraid. But afraid of what? I enter and see her for the first time in literally years. She's changed. It's not the physical appearance, but something intangable... I can't describe it. But anyway we go out and get lunch and talk for an hour about everything... From roomates to plans in the future. (Surprise, I still don't have any.) But during that time, I'm trying to figure out if she's really hinting at something. Heh, it's probably just my insecurities talking... We part ways with just a "it's good seeing you." and that's that. I notice two things during that whole conversation. We really didn't laugh a whole lot when talking about the past, and we make no plans for the future.
Which brings me to today... I wanted to know how she's feeling, so I asked her directly. She avoided the question though. *sigh* females. I'll never understand them. Actually, I'll never understand my feelings either. I felt something when I opened that door. It's not love... I'd like to say some sort of spark, but that sounds too poetic.
For all the bitching and complaining I've done... All the guilt at not doing the right things... It has all come back. I could look at it with disgust... One would think I was headed in the right direction earlier this month. But I could also look at it as a start of something I messed up a long time ago. I spent the past two days thinking about this. Maybe I can do things right this time. Friends after a break-up? I think you heard me say that it's some twisted joke. Now I'm beginning to wonder. Can we start again?
So, I've come to the conclusion that I'm going to try again. And I mean all over. Years can change a person and I'm curious to know what kind of person she is now. Am I making a mistake? I hope not. I'll do things right and see where I end up. If it's with her, then fine. If not... Well. I might end up feeling a little better knowing I tried.
Sorry... This probably doesn't make too much sense, but I had to vent... I'll edit it later to clarify stuff... Thanks for listening guys.
This past weekend, I actually ended up talking with Lori... She called me one day and things went from there. The past week has actually been a pretty big blur. I remember getting a call and an e-mail and I set up a meeting for lunch on Monday.
During the phone conversation, the whole relationship thing gets brought up. You know, past relationships and such... It was really something I didn't want to know... But at the end of it, she says she's tired of being single. How the hell am I supposed to interpret that one? On one hand she paints a picture of her happiness these past years, and then basically states that she's looking for someone special. Ugh.
So Monday comes by. I have to pick her up from work for her lunch break. I get to the door, and I knock. I hear her voice. It sounds the same. I freeze for a second or two... I want to open the door and see her, but another part is a little afraid. But afraid of what? I enter and see her for the first time in literally years. She's changed. It's not the physical appearance, but something intangable... I can't describe it. But anyway we go out and get lunch and talk for an hour about everything... From roomates to plans in the future. (Surprise, I still don't have any.) But during that time, I'm trying to figure out if she's really hinting at something. Heh, it's probably just my insecurities talking... We part ways with just a "it's good seeing you." and that's that. I notice two things during that whole conversation. We really didn't laugh a whole lot when talking about the past, and we make no plans for the future.
Which brings me to today... I wanted to know how she's feeling, so I asked her directly. She avoided the question though. *sigh* females. I'll never understand them. Actually, I'll never understand my feelings either. I felt something when I opened that door. It's not love... I'd like to say some sort of spark, but that sounds too poetic.
For all the bitching and complaining I've done... All the guilt at not doing the right things... It has all come back. I could look at it with disgust... One would think I was headed in the right direction earlier this month. But I could also look at it as a start of something I messed up a long time ago. I spent the past two days thinking about this. Maybe I can do things right this time. Friends after a break-up? I think you heard me say that it's some twisted joke. Now I'm beginning to wonder. Can we start again?
So, I've come to the conclusion that I'm going to try again. And I mean all over. Years can change a person and I'm curious to know what kind of person she is now. Am I making a mistake? I hope not. I'll do things right and see where I end up. If it's with her, then fine. If not... Well. I might end up feeling a little better knowing I tried.
Sorry... This probably doesn't make too much sense, but I had to vent... I'll edit it later to clarify stuff... Thanks for listening guys.
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