Weeeeeee! Isn't San Jose fun?! hehe

Ok, yes I'm double blogging mostly because no one else has written anything and I can't sleep. Surprise Surprise! But, anyway it's been great seeing everyone during the break and hopefully I will get to see others. To anyone who played Football for the annual Turkey Bowl, I am sore, I can't move my legs, but it was all fun. Hope to do it again soon!

I finally sent my pictures to get developed so there could potentially be some new material on my Web site by Sunday, but who knows. I also have a lot of hw to be done for next week (two presentations, Sr Project and a DB). Good thing about all of this is taht I only have one final. Woo hoo! After Friday there will be only a little stress on Bryant's poor little mind.

So far the highlights of break are winning at 13, playing socom with brendan in the same room, having 3 great thanksgiving meals (Yams and Apple pie, absolutely delicious!), but as always it's been great seeing my friends. It was especially nice having one of my long talks with Derek. Since he decides not to blog very often and I don't get a hold of him too much during the quarter it was nice to catch up. It was fun because we got to reminise about the old times, old gfs, philosophies in life, school, friends, and the future.

To sum up some more important things that I thought we talked about:
Is it really better to love and lose, than to never love at all? In a romantic relationship sense not like parents, friends, attachment to Socom hehe. I said right now I hate losing love, so it's not better. But I know down the line, I'll be happy that I was given the chance to fall in love. To go through your whole life without love, that just boggles my mind that it could happen to someone. I now have something to strive for later in life. It's not something I'm going to actively search for right now, but if something comes up, I know I can't let the opportunity pass me by. Derek made the same point about how he would rather love and lose, then to never love at all.

Another thing that we talked about is how friends get all pissy when others joke around about the others girlfriend. With the nature of our group and our friendship, I think it's dumb that someone would really get angry if we joked around about someone else's gf. I think we all know there's a time where it can be too much, but I don't think we've ever gotten into that territory. I hope I wasn't that way with my gf's. But sometimes your blinded, so maybe I could've been, but I really don't think I ever got offended because I know you guys don't really mean it and if you did or had a problem with someone you would tell me immediately.

We talked about regrets in relationships, love, etc. Derek made a point that got me. When people ask "Why her?" or "Why is she the one?" ...etc....most of the times the answer will not be there. And it's mostly up to the person, but for me especially it's just a gut feeling. There's just everything in your body that screams that it's right. It's pretty much unexplainable, but it's a feeling that I would love to have forever.

Something that Derek and I talked about before I went back to school was an interesting topic, I thought at least. Derek asked me if I were to choose to fall in love, but travel to a distant land w/ her because her job was over there, and potentially lose a great job here in the states and lose some of the security in life or to continue on with my career to create that stability and potentially get back together later, but it wasn't certain, what would I do? Well, for me it depends on how much my logical side takes over my emotional side, vice versa. It would be really hard for me pack up and go because I'm the type of person who creates a comfort level and it's hard for me to break that. But to fall in love, it's one of the best feelings in the world and it would terrible to let that kind of opportunity pass me by. These types of questions, I'm not that great at answering mostly because I hate to worry about things until they actually happen, but this one got me thinking. Don't know why.

Another thing that got me thinking after talking w/ Hapachan, was about our personalities and about how we perceive friendships. Like if someone does something mean, I like to give them the benefit of the doubt that they didn't mean to, especially if they're my friend. Does that lead to me being potentially stepped on? Maybe. Being naive? Probably. But my flip side to it is if someone intentionally tries to hurt me and I find out about it, that puts one hellava strain on our friendship. You lose my loyalty and trust as a friend and its hard to gain back. I like to try and be that friendly person and take care of my friends the best I can, I try and be there always for them and if they want to potentially ruin screw that up, that's there choice, but I think that's their loss. I don't know, something tells me I might have to change my philosophy so that things don't hurt as much when I get disappointed in others. Easier said than done. hehe

I apologize, I've rambled on and on. It's weird, whenever I start writing in this thing, it feels like I can talk for days about random stuff in my head. I'm finally trying to get my life back on track and I guess this helps me move along more smoothly. Anyway, I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving and I will talk to you all soon. Take care.